so sorry...

these two little words...
i read a whole 'pertinent to this post' blurb on sorry but have misplaced it in the haze of reality that is hitting home right now... when and if found i will add it on...
i found myself in the irony of having to mutter these words almost mechanically tonight. what i had read was that people die and the first thing uttered is 'i'm sorry, so sorry, etc', with the reality being always the emphasis on the negative and how we should celebrate rather than mourn...
but tonight a friend says 'things are a little hectic my uncle was murdered...' and immediately i respond with 'shit i am sorry'.
it seemed so natural and after i sat back thinking what else could be said? i don’t know the person and it feels so unnatural to say well he had a good life, look on the bright side he's in a better place (if this fits with your belief system), celebrate his life don’t focus on the negative...
none of that seems to concretise the emotion of the situation. maybe the reason why a person apologises is not because of the situation but because of the fact that another feels an emptiness left by the absence of another’s presence that cant be ignored.
i don’t think it is a focus on the negative or a pessimism that leads us down the 'so sorry' road, i think it is rather that one is truly sorry another has to experience that emotion and how obvious it is that we have to experience it.